INVADING THE KING'S PRIVACY

Cecil has just retrieved the Mysidian Crystal through brutal means. Unjustly stripped of his command of Baron's Airship fleet, he is given a new mission by his king.

In retrospect, it's either a really good thing or a damned shame that Cecil didn't open the package right there just to see what was in it.

Clearly, this Baigan guy is not going to let Cecil through. As the situation is now, the only way we're getting into that throne room is by burning down a village and killing someone's mother, killing an innocent octopus, an Antlion, a bomb thing, getting shipwrecked, fighting some creepy "fiend" dude once, then killing him again after he's already dead(!), being turned into a woman Paladin, then finally coming back to kill that dude currently blocking the door.

That's an awful lot of killing you have to do to become a warrior of light when we could simply push Baigan out of the way and barge in. Let's see what would happen if we sneak around Baigan and try to talk some sense into our misguided king.

Hey now, maybe we were on the right track. Clearly the king is feeling bad about what he's done and will now restore our rank and give that other mission, whatever it is, to someone else.

Don't be too hard on the king. He's old, and it's easy to see why he might be confused. Our suit of armor, blacker than the blackest night, and unholy sword of instand death could easily be confused for the garb of a Paladin.

Wutt?! Dude, I don't care if you like to dress up as a turtle thing or whatever when you're by yourself. I'm not into that sort of thing. BTW, are you related to my friend Kain?

Hmm, this silence is kind of awkward. Should I undress or something to break the tension?

I don't get it. Gathering.... water? Could it be time for tea? Or are we going to make Kool-Aid? This afternoon with the turtle king might be fun afterall.

Eew, the king is standing naked in our Kool-Aid water and he spilled alphabits or something in it, too. Oh, wait a second. I see, it's the start of a tidal wave. It's true that Cecil is wearing impossibly heavy and restrictive armor, but I'm sure it'll be fine.

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

The lesson here is that you should always commit as much murder as possible, preferably of creatures weaker than yourself. That way, you can be a stronger holy warrior. And you should find other murderers along the way in case you ever get attacked by a naked turtle that doesn't like Kool-Aid.